Thursday, November 29, 2007

Shop Til You Drop

Tonite I went up to Bloomingdales after work. There was a big 'private' sale going on, and it involved coupons. So we had dinner at the cafe (where, to my surprise, a coupon was also involved) and headed to the mens department to find what we could for Dad for Christmas.

Historically, I have done very well in Bloomingdales for my father for Christmas. Alas, this Christmas, that was not to be the case.

Aside from the Polo section, the rest of the clothing in the mens department appeared to be centered around either brooding emo boys or attorneys. Gray prewashed stenciled tshirts or a rainbow of ties fanned out across table after table. Take your pick. Nothing there really for a man of my fathers age.

In the end, I left the store with 2 pair of Via Spiga boots for the price of one (thank you again, coupon!), some Bogdan's mint reception sticks and mascara. The nice saleslady gave me the free gift even though my purchase was $4 shy of the "free with purchase" price.

It's funny though. The mens department at Bloomies always makes me think of Shepard Smith. I think it's the brightly hued neckties or the geometric pattern dress shirts. Or something. Whatever it is, a visit to the Bloomingdales mens department always makes me want to make over Shep.

It's not that he doesn't dress's just that he doesn't dress the way I feel he should. If he would only consult with me, I could no doubt make him one of the best dressers on television. Even better than that walking ego, Brian Williams (and this comes from a woman who has renamed a shade of blue "Brian Williams Blue". Say what you want, the ego does dress well)

The offer is on the table, Shepard. Anytime, any Bloomingdales or Nordstrom...I can work wonders ;)

The same offer is extended to Mike Rowe of Dirty Jobs...except if I ever got him undressed, DRESSING him would be the last thing on my mind...

Thank God tomorrow is Friday...I seriously need a couple of days off!

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

In the Ville...

So I started my Christmas know...the one I swore up and down I was NOT doing this year under ANY circumstances.


That one.

I got all the kristmas krap out of the attic on Sunday, and set it all out. Houses on one table, people and accessories on the other, electrical gizmos to enhance the village experience in between the two. A box of trees here. Bag of mountains there. Lord & Taylor shopping bag full of wires under the table. Styrofoam as far as the eye can see.

Hey, Mike Rowe...want to see a dirty job? Come over to my house and set up my ville...I'm covered from head to toe with ground styrofoam snow, chopped mylar and glitter...two different kinds of glitter, at that! And let's not forget the tackywax! Gotta have the tackywax! Otherwise everthing just sort of topples over from the floor vibrations...and once you have your scene set, the LAST thing you want is for your damn people or your stupid streetlights to topple over.

Yes, as you can see, the Christmas Spirit has filled me.

The end result is usually quite stunning visually. It's not so much the scale of it~compared to others, my village isn't that large.

The devil, as they say, is in the details...and I try to put as many of those in as I possibly can. Alleyways with trash cans, street details like firehydrants and telephone poles, a festive village square. It's time consuming and at times, maddening, but in the end, I guess its pretty worth it.

But I seriously cannot wait to finish.

I missed the first showing of Dirty Jobs tonite...hope I stay awake for the second show. Gotta have my Mike Rowe fix! I hear tonite he gets to sniff he was thrilled ;)

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

...and so it begins...

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. It's a time when we are supposed to sit back, enjoy a feast with our loved ones, and reflect on the past year, giving thanks for how good we have it. Just like the Pilgrims did all those years ago in Plymouth colony. They were grateful for living thru the harsh winter, and for the friendship of the Indians, who helped them survive.

Except that, we don't exactly DO that anymore, do we?

Instead, we obsess over where we are going. Who is going to be there? Who's coming to our house? Who's bringing what? Is the turkey big enough? What kind of potatoes is she making? Who's doing the dishes? What time does the WalMart open for those Black Friday sales?

Where is the thanks?

Where is the gratefulness?

Where is the reflection?

Everything is rushrushrushrush.

Everyone's worried about getting past Thanksgiving and on to Christmas.

No one stops to smell the turkey anymore.

Thanksgiving has stopped being about giving thanks and has become the Official Kick~off of Christmas.

So, on this Thanksgiving eve, I've decided to sit down and reflect on what I am truly thankful for, instead of dwelling on what is lacking in my life. Oh, there is plenty that is lacking~job satisfaction, someone to love and share my life with, a home of my own...the list is long and makes me feel sad.

But what do I have? What have I been blessed with? What should I be joyful that I have and give thanks for?

I've been blessed with parents who care a great deal about me, maybe too much. But they are always there, a safety net so that when I fall, at least someone is there to help me up.

I'm grateful that I have a job. Inasmuch as I despise what I do these days, and like where I work even less, at the very least, I make a little bit of money and can splurge at Bloomies once in a while when they have a sale. The Michael Kors pumps on my feet are proof of that. I am thankful for them, and the sale that put them there.

I'm thankful that FoxNews resigned Shepard Smith to a multi~year deal at a high salary. I like Shepard and I'm glad he's being treated right by his employer. Actually, I'm glad that I see someone who is good at what they do being treated well at their job. I may not be treated or paid very well for breaking my back at my job, but at least I know there is hope because I can see that there are indeed employers who reward good employees. Maybe someday I will have one of those jobs.

I'm thankful that I found Dirty Jobs on Discovery channel. It makes me realize that there are people out there who do what some of us would consider beneath us so that we can live in a civilized world. I am grateful that I found Mike Rowe. He and his beautiful chest are easy on the eyes and he makes me smile. He gives me hope that there are indeed men out there who can make me laugh without having to drop their pants.

I give thanks for the good friends that I have. For Sherri Ann, who, while we don't speak often, has been a steady beam of light for me for some 30 years. For Katy, who's helped me get thru more than she knows. For Ruby Anne who is like the southern version of me. I don't have a lot of friends, but the ones I have are good and strong and true.

I'm grateful for my mind. Because, while I sometimes fear I am losing it, it is what keeps me going, what helps me get thru. It is what helped me to write the book I hope to one day publish. Hopefully, one day soon.

And, I'm thankful for my sense of humor and the ability to laugh at myself~before others can, I hope.

There may be a lot of things that I want in my life that I don't have, and maybe some things that I have that I don't want, but there are always things to give thanks for. Remember, no matter how bad you think it is, there is always someone who has it worse. Tomorrow, I will have a good dinner with my family in a warm, dry place. Not everyone can say that.

So, please, on this Thanksgiving, on the eve of the blessed holiday season, take a moment or two to sit and think...and thank.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

One More Day....

All I have to do to have a nice 4 day weekend is get thru one more day of misery. Think I can pull it off? Goodness knows today was the LONGEST day in a long time! Good Grief how time drags when you don't want to be where you are!

So Shepard Smith wished us all a Happy Thanksgiving tonite...he's off for his holiday. I remember a couple of years ago, the day before Thanksgiving, he was quite excited. Said he thought of Thanksgiving as a "grazing" holiday, since all you really did all day was sit around and eat, then eat some more. He's right. Most traditional families do just that.

But not mine.

No, mine has to go to the casino for Thanksgiving.

No turkey.

No cranberry sauce.

No stuffing.

No asparagus patties.

I sound like Ralphie narrating A Christmas Story at the end, when the Bumpus's dogs get into the house and eat the Christmas turkey.

Guess I'll be having something from the buffet for dinner. Maybe they'll have turkey? I know we had turkey dinner that Thanksgiving we spent at Walt Disney World.

Told you we were different ;)

Monday, November 19, 2007

$hepard $mith

So the big news in the news game today was Shepard Smith and his new contract with FoxNews.

Historically, Shepard has never discussed the terms of his contracts, which is something that I think is his prerogative, really. It's not my business how much he makes. I'm not signing his checks.

But this contract is different.

In a deal that is said to be somewhere in the neighborhood of 3 years, 7 to 8 million dollars per year, Shepard Smith has now eclipsed his cable news peers and become the highest paid cable news anchor, putting him in the same neighborhood as network stars like Brian Williams.

Somewhere, Keith Olbermann is crying.

I do have to say, it's about damn time. I know that I have taken Shepard to task previously in this blog, but it's not because I don't think he's good. Quite the opposite. I think he's amazing newsman, and I have stated that in the past. No other anchor man on our television today, network or cable, works as hard as Shepard does, or throws himself as deeply into his stories as Shepard. Sometimes emotional, sometimes funny, always on his game. To me, he is worth every penny.

Of course, that doesn't mean constructive criticism of his shows is off limits here... ;)

Real and true congratulations to you, Shepard Smith, and an old Irish blessing for you:

May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind always be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
and rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Jib Jab...

you can do some baaaad things with that....mwahahahaha...

Just Sayin'...

I got home tonight in time to catch the last 10 minutes of the new and improved FoxReport with Shepard Smith.

Now, before I go any further, regular readers of this blog (if there are any of you LOL) and anyone who knows me personally, all know that I do indeed love Shepard Smith. I feel he's the best anchorman out there today, and one of the finest field reporters in the game today. He's also not afraid to laugh at himself and crack a joke, even if it's not in the most appropriate spot.

OK, disclaimer in place, I now can proceed.

I flipped on FNC just in time to see a report from the, a college news website that seems to have caught
Shepard's fancy. Apparently, tomorrow is a big game for Ohio State University's football team and the students were celebrating by tossing themselves into a body of 40 degree temperatures. College kids usually do crazy things like least they did back in the day when I was in school. this news?

The next segment dealt with Vegas...David Copperfield's first show since the rape allegations, and OJ Simpson. The ever classy Trace Gallagher was in Vegas, reporting on Copperfield. Then Shepard launched into a story about OJ and his "posse"...detailing the differences between and "entourage" and a "posse" in a segment called "Just Sayin'", with a graphic of what looked to be a silouhette of Shepard, shrugging.

OK, back it up there, Smith. Aren't you the man who, while doing press to promote the changes being made to FoxReport, said how you were getting rid of the teases and what not to bring MORE news to the people? In fact, I am looking at an interview you gave to TV Guide online this past August about just such a thing.

And here is a quote from that interview...

"We have to do more news. We've already given up the "coming up" teasing that we were known for in the early days. We've taken all of the time and put it into content. We did that because viewers said that's what they wanted. Viewers have said, "Stop telling me for 45 seconds what you're going to do in the next four minutes." So we have. We're not going to do more crap. We're not going to do more titillating [stories], Hollywood-movie reviews and jokes. We're going to do less of that. There are other places that do that better than we do. I don't make any apologies for the way we've done it in the past. There was an atmosphere where it was acceptable because people didn't have so much of it. We need to do news."

Things called "The Daily Britney" and "Just Sayin'" and items about college kids getting pumped for a big game from aren't "news" least not by the definition that I know news as. They may be interesting, curious, entertaining and maybe even funny. But they are not news.

Personally, I don't care what is used to fill a newscast. Just don't promise me more news and deliver more gossip.

I'm just sayin'...


Don't Try This At Home!

if I could figure out how to get the one I made in here, I'd do it!!

edited to add...figured it out!!

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Dear Shepard...

I was poking around my desk, which is essentially an avalanche waiting to happen, when I unearthed an old issue of TV Guide...from back when it was, well, TV Guide size. The cover date was Sept 25-Oct 1, 2005. CSI Returns! Screamed the cover! Inside was a special edition of a page called "News Flashes", where TV Guide spoke to 3 of the news faces of the then recent Hurricane Katrina~Brian Williams of NBC, Elizabeth Vargas of ABC and Shepard Smith of FNC. Each journalist had a single column about their coverage. After reading it again, I decided to write an open letter to Shepard Smith.

Shepard's column on that page told of how FNC forced he and his crew to leave their perch on the I-10 overpass in New Orleans because they were worried about their mental health, but how after a few days, he headed to his native Mississippi.

This is how Shepard's column ended:

"Says Smith, 'I want to tell their individual stories.'"

Over two years have passed. During his initial visit to Waveland, MS, in the first week after Katrina, he had met a man named Brian who had a little dog named Rocky. Brian and Rocky had ridden the deadly 30 foot high wall of water as it washed away the town and had managed to survive. That night, upon his return to the scene, Shepard sat at a makeshift candlelit table with Brian and a few of his friends, all survivors, talking about the disaster, their survival, and their desire to rebuild. Shepard Smith sat there, legs crossed, Waveland cap on his head. He looked at peace. That Christmas, he returned to Waveland and followed up with Brain and his little dog, now living in a FEMA trailer.

Shepard returned to the region again for Holy Week the following spring, giving an update on the clean up efforts, and asking residents after losing everything, what, if anything, could they possibly be giving up for Lent. He also returned for the first anniversary of Katrina, reporting on the clean up and rebuilding that was going on in the region.

I haven't really heard much of anything about Katrina since then from Shepard. A report here and there, FEMA this, Mayor Nagin that, Governor voted out, but beyond that? Nothing.

Where are all of the individual stories that you wanted to tell, Shepard?

I think Shepard Smith missed a monumental opportunity.

Forget for a minute that he is a newsman, and remember that he is a man. A man who grew up in small town Mississippi, who'd father still lives in that same small town. A man who still lives and dies with his beloved Ole Miss Rebels. A man with the ability to tell a story and leave you enthralled.

A man with a forum and an audience...yet he did nothing.

Now, I'm not saying he didn't do anything to help after Katrina, not at all. I know he participated in a fund raiser with Governor Haley Barbour in DC after the hurricane. I am sure that he himself has given money, and quite possibly time, to help rebuild the Mississippi Gulf coast. I know he cares. As he told his viewers during the initial shock of Katrina, that is his home.

But he did not tell us those stories that he told TV Guide he so wanted to tell in the initial wake of the disaster, the tales of survival and of loss. Of rebuilding and of redemption. Of sadness and joy.

Yes, Shepard Smith missed a huge opportunity...and his loss is our loss. We will never get to hear those individual stories. We will never get to know, to cry, to mourn with those whose lives were changed forever that day or to rejoice in those small personal miracles that we all know occur. We don't know if Brian and Rocky are still in their FEMA trailer, or if they were ever able to rebuild their home.

Shepard Smith has what I consider to be an extraordinary gift. He has the ability to tell a story and to compel you with it. He has a way of holding your attention, of making you care. He is able to have his passion reach out thru your television screen and into your heart. He has the ability to make a difference.

I guess I just expected more from someone I respected like Shepard Smith. I thought he really would decide stand up, step to the front and make a difference, especially for his beloved Mississippi.

Come on, Shepard...make a difference...

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Darn That Smile

So Shepard sucked me back in for a moment tonite. First by referring to his FoxReport and it's new set as a circus tent. Then he gave that darn impish little grin of his and my heart just melted a little bit. Must. Resist. Impish. Grin.

Moving was hotter than the gates of Hades at the office today, giving me reason to believe that I am, in fact, correct, and we do indeed work in a portal to hell. You know what that makes the bossman....

There was a new episode of Dirty Jobs on tonite...but first, there was a repeat of Mike Rowe's second visit to the alligator farm. This time, Jerry took Mike on an alligator egg hunt, complete with real alligators...and fire ants. After seeing this tonite, I have to say I am glad we don't have fire ants in NY. Poor Mike. First the ants got him on his hands and arms. They seemed to gravitate to his armpits and up to his neck, leaving welts in their wake that were at first painful, then itchy. The really bad part happened when they somehow managed to get into his pants. I don't know how much this man makes for this, but I don't think there is any amount of money that could possibly compensate someone for having his manbits nibbled on by fire ants. I'll admit it...I laughed. But I did feel guilty for laughing at his pain. Later on, an alligator tail nailed him once again in the jewels. Guess it just wasn't Mike Rowe's day *guilty smirk*

The new episode took place first at the San Francisco dump. Oh. My. God. You never consider what happens to your trash once you bag it and can it and the dude with the stubby little cigar in the corner of his mouth takes it away. You never think about the people who process your trash. Yes...people actually process the trash. I swear, I felt as though I could almost smell the garbage, thats how disgusting it was. I have to wonder if the Dirty Jobs crew has, by now, lost their sense of smell. Nasty. Nasty. Nasty. They seemed to get a reprieve from major stenches in the second job of the new episode, which took place at an animal sanctuary in Georgia. Well, there was poo, and a pig, but it had to smell like paradise compared to the dump...even when shoveling poo. was frozen poo. Or so he said...but this is another man who's smile makes me forget why I was grossed out.

Seriously...I need to tie one of these men and keep him at the office, so when I'm sitting there wondering if we are having a group hot flash, they can smile at me and make me forget I'm melting!

Monday, November 12, 2007

Sorry, Shepard...

For over 2 years now, I've loyally watched and loved Shepard Smith of FoxNews. Laugh if you must, but the guy is good. Witty and funny when he can be, serious and tenacious when he has to be.

However recent, changes to both of his shows have rendered them, to me, sadly, nearly unwatchable.

Don't get me wrong, aside from what I view as a loud, obnoxious set, FoxReport, the 7pm newscast Shepard anchors, is still good. Quick and concise stories packaged up neatly...just delivered with a little too much flash for me.

My problem lies with StudioB, Shepard's 3pm show. I used to enjoy StudioB much more than FoxReport. It was a looser version of FoxReport, highlighted by a segment, usually at the bottom of the hour, called "Skinnerville". It was here that Jane Skinner would read the half-hour headlines, and then interact with Shepard about anything under the sun. There were many laughs to be had during Skinnerville, and it was always, to me, and others I know, the most enjoyable segment of either of Shepard's shows.

Sadly, all of that changed about a year ago, after Jane got her own show the hour before StudioB. Sure, at first, it continued, with Shepard reading the bottom of the hour headlines for Jane, then carrying on a "Shepardville" during her hour and then the traditional Skinnerville during Shepards hour. It was short lived and soon we lost both Shepardville and the beloved Skinnerville.

For a while, I honestly didn't really enjoy StudioB, but I didn't find it unwatchable.

Enter Courtney Friel.

Now, usually I don't really care who's delivering the story, providing I can get the facts in a clear, concise manner.

Ms. Friel is neither clear nor concise. FoxNews has seen fit to shove her down our collective gullets at all turns. Weekdays, weekends, late nights, you name a program and there's always a good chance she's going to pop up on it.

At first, it wasn't so bad. She's new, I thought. Maybe she needs time to adjust.

Well, the honeymoon, as they say, is over.

I'm going to try to say this in the nicest terms I possibly can. Below is a list. At one time or another, while on air, Courtney Friel has been guilty of at least one:

Forgetting what she was saying
Watching herself in the monitor
Complaining her arms looked fat
Saying something completely inappropriate

About the only thing she hasn't done on air is wave while mouthing "I'm on TV!" excitedly. At times, I've wondered if I've wandered into some parallel universe where the Brady Bunch is still on and Marsha got a job on TV. FoxNews has a lot of very pretty women on it's staff, but they are all highly professional and I have never seen any of them giggle and tell Shepard Smith that their arms look fat on TV.

I'm not saying Courtney Friel is a bad person. Far from it. I'm sure she's a very nice person. What I am saying is that she is not what I want to see when I turn on a news report anchored by someone who I respect as a news journalist. I just don't feel she fits in with the news. She belongs more on an entertainment show instead. But as long as she is on StudioB, I will no longer be watching.

Sad end of an era that started for me over 2 years ago with Shepard Smith's outrage on a dark and hot bridge leading from New Orleans into New Gretna, Louisiana...

Sunday, November 11, 2007

How Come Bridezilla?

Since Discovery has seen fit to not show me any Mike Rowe and Dirty Jobs this weekend, despite the program guide I printed out off the website this week, I was left instead to flip around the dial and hope for something watchable.

I found that this morning in the form of Bridezilla's on WE.

I don't know how really "watchable" Bridezilla's's more like driving past a train wreck and having to slow down to take a peek.

Each week, Bridezilla's treats us to two or three women who are stressing out over their impending weddings. "Stressing" being a kind way of saying "bitches on wheels".

I just don't get it. These women scream, cry, threaten, abuse, and generally carry the diva act to new heights....and the men they are marrying sit there and take all of this, then coddle them.

Where do they find these guys?

Is there a store at the mall selling them? Because if there is, I sure as heck have missed it! Maybe they were a Today's Special Value on QVC that sold out while I was sleeping (hmm...Mike Rowe...did you ever sell any of those during your stint there? ;) )

In any event, it just numbs my mind how these high maintenance, highly demanding, overly controlling and conniving women seem to always find these salt of the earth men to cater to them and their every whim.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, a woman such as my self who isn't strung nearly as tightly, can't find a man worth diddly.

Maybe if I had the temperament of a spoiled Chihuahua I'd have better luck?

I try not to think about it, but WE seems hell bent on shoving miserably spoiled brides in my face at every turn.

Maybe this is why I find Dirty Jobs to be such a breath of fresh air. No way you'll be seeing Mike Rowe catering to the whimsies of a demanding bride...he'd just toss her into the mud :)

...and have I mentioned he's not too hard on the eyes? Particularly when shirtless? ;)

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

I LOVE The 80s

Flipping around tonite, since Discovery has seen fit to make me wait until tomorrow night to see Mike Rowe again. I happened upon the last hour of Vh1's top songs of the 80s countdown.


Music and videos I haven't seen in forever!

Jessie's Girl

Time After Time

Like a Virgin

Don't Stop Believing

Pour Some Sugar On Me

Livin On A Prayer

Of course, most of the songs I heard, plus a whole lot more, are readily available on my iPod. But the videos? I miss the videos.

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I remember life in college. Get up in the morning and turn on the tv. Of course, rarely was it ever off MTV...then again, this was also back when the "M" in MTV stood for "Music". Back then, it was like turning on the radio. Wall to wall music, 24 hours a day, with 5 shifts of "VJs". These were 3 men and 2 women who acted like dj's on the radio, except with music videos. We had JJ Jackson, Mark Goodman, Alan Hunter, Nina Blackwood and Martha Quinn.

JJ Jackson was the old radio veteran. Mark Goodman had long curly hair and was the 'rock' hottie. Alan Hunter was the blonde haired, blue eyed boy next door with a little edge. Nina Blackwood hosted "Headbangers Ball" and Martha C Quinn was the cute girl.

Of course, this was a time before cell phones, blackberries and the internet. A time before iPods and "downloading". A time when the term "multi~tasking" didn't exist. Life was simpler. You got up, you got dressed, you went to school, you came home, did your homework and had your social life...all to an MTV soundtrack.

MTV had standards back then. If a video came to them with questionable content (explicit sex, nudity, heavy with violence) they would refuse to play it and send it back for editing before airing. I remember watching Friday Night Videos on USA Network to see the "uncut" versions of DuranDuran's "Girls on Film" or David Bowie's "China Girl" just to see what we were missing. By todays standards...what we were missing was mild.

During each hour, videos would play, then there'd be a break where the VJ would come on and talk about the music, give you tour info and music news and generally act as seguay between videos. At the top of every hour, and animated Apollo~era rocket would take off and the MTV theme music~nothing really more than some cool guitar riffs~would play, signaling that it was indeed the top of the hour. On the half hour, a shorter version of the rocket went up. This was really the only way we knew what time it was, since the whole 24~hour news channel "lower third" concept hadn't been invented yet. Sadly, the day the Challenger exploded on takeoff changed all that. I remember on the hour after the accident, the usual rocket did not go up. Instead, a senior vice president of the network was on, explaining that, at least for the time being, there would no longer be a rocket out of respect.

Live Aid was the crown jewel, and possibly the pinnacle of MTV back in the 80s. Two concerts, one in JFK Stadium in Philadelphia, the other at Wembly Stadium in England, going on simultaneously, being broadcast live, all to raise money for famine relief in Ethiopia. Brainchild of Bob Geldoff of the Boomtown Rats, Live Aid would go on to become the stuff of legends. Phil Collins played Wembly Stadium, then flew across the pond, to play JFK. The biggest names in music played. All for a good cause.

Of course, time passed and I graduated college and went on to the business world. Music started to change and I found myself watching less and less of MTV. MTV itself started to change, too. The original 5 VJ's were eventually replaced. A new 'regular' show~a game show~was now on MTV's schedule. Then more "regular" shows started showing up. Eventually, the "M" in MTV was silent. Now, its rare to find a music video television. It makes me sad, really. And seeing a show like this countdown tonite makes me nostalgic and wanting to yell


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Monday, November 5, 2007


I haven't seen a Dirty Jobs episode since Friday night. I think I am officially having Mike Rowe withdrawals

I just can't help it! The show, and it's host, are addictive! What's not to like? The premise alone is intriguing: take a man who's not skilled in a basically manual labor type job and drop him into the job for a day, to learn and do it. Make it a very DIRTY job and make the man have a sexy deep voice and an amazingly hairy chest just to get my attention and you have a winning combination!

Pardon me while I indulge myself and attempt to satisfy this need I have...

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Feeling much better now ;)

Sunday, November 4, 2007

It Always Comes Back To The Poo...

So I was away for the weekend with some friends at the Borgata in Atlantic City. While the gaming was uneventful (I lost again in what must be the second longest streak of futility this side of the Chicago Cubs), the company was great!

Everyone did their own thing in the casino, but convened at Wolfgang Pucks restaurant for dinner. There was a line prior to it's opening, since the tavern part where we decided to dine does not accept reservations, so my mother gamely waited. Wolfgang Puck was there, it turned out, because he was in one of the shops signing his new cookbook (it also didnt hurt that this past weekend players of a certain level which I am not received a beautiful Wolfgang Puck knife set) Wolfgang walked out to the front entrance of his restaurant at around ten to five, and decided everyone must be let in right then. His right hand man happened to be standing next to my mother, who remarked "Wow, he looks so much younger in person than he does on tv!" and there was Wolfgang with his arm around her, thanking her for the compliment. They also talked about his turkey episode on Food Network, my mothers favorite network.

Well, dinner, it turned out, was indeed a disaster. The waiter was less than interested in taking our orders, and even less interested in getting them right. The salads were nice, except for the one ordered without the blue cheese dressing...which came dressed none the less. The burgers were an even bigger disaster...cooked not to order, and the cheese that was supposed to be melted on them was just slapped on top! One of the managers happened to be walking over to our table with the ketchup she noted had not been delivered by the waiter, when she heard me grumbing about the not melted cheese. Now, dont get me wrong. I'm not really that high maintenance food~wise. I just expect that if the cheese is to be melted, that it is (and I have had this burger on numerous occasions, and it was never like this) Long story short, the waiter had been let go earlier in the week and was just finishing out his last shift, therefore not really having much interest in whether or not he did what he was supposed to do. It was then that Wolfgangs man, who we learned was named Alex and worked for Wolfgang for 12 years, came over. He decided that he would take care of desert for us.

While waiting for desert, Wolfgang Puck once again appeared. The place went nuts! This is a celebrity chef who thoroughly enjoys his celebrity status. Pleasant and smiling, he shook hands and took photos graciously~unlike the dour Bobby Flay, I might add.

He even took a picture with moi!

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Yay for cameras in cell phones! Boo for cameras in cell phones with no flashes!

My first celebrity photo~although I would have preferred if it were Mike Rowe ;)

Desert arrived...or should I say ever desert on the menu arrived!

We had strawberries and creme, banana cream tart, pumpkin cheesecake, chocolate mousse souffle, chocolate brownie souffle and apple crumble.

Now, this is also when the fun~and poo~began!

The chocolate mousse souffle was put down, and Tony turned to me and said "That looks like a giraffe took a dump in the dish!"

To which I responded: "Actually, giraffe poo looks more like cocoa puffs!"

Next out was the pumpkin cheesecake with a fruit melange and a dollop of ice cream. It wasn't your ordinary dollop, however, and it looked more like one of the fish regurgitated by the birds on the "vomit island" edition of Dirty Jobs.

As you can imagine, the conversation went right into the litter box from there!

And I think my friends are now highly intrigued by Dirty Jobs...and giraffe poo!